PDL #14 - Distance apart

often, people ask me: if there is a God, how can He let such bad things happen?

it is very easy indeed to thank God and feel God's hands when everything goes well - thank God for my good results, for my promotion, for getting a girlfriend, for the huge bonus.. the list goes on. but when the bad things happen, suddenly, for many, God doesn't seems to be around.

indeed, i had a fair share of the bad things the past few years, and indeed, i couldn't help wondering where is God in all these, even though i know very well that He is. and indeed He is.

ironically, one of the example i always used to make sense of this come from a very controversial book. someday when you have children, would you allow them to learn to cycle even though you know very well they are going to hurt themselves through the process? (strangely, when i learned to cycle, i never fell before, all the way till the one time when i flew down the slope at ubin) when you stop supporting your kid, and allow him to cycle on his own, the distance between you and him gets further, but im sure your eyes were always on him, making sure he doesnt go onto the road, and ride straight into the drains.

God allows us to get into bad situations because the process of dealing with the pain and the disappointment will in one way or another, shape you to be a better version of yourself. He is never too far away, and He is always watching you.

PDL #13 - real worship

when i was growing up, i first encountered christianity when i stepped into st andrew's school. after a year or two of daily sermons and weekly chapel lessons, i was invited to my first church service. not knowing what being a christian really mean, i just went along to a very popular church (even back then) who was holding their good friday service in the indoor stadium. it was known that alot of my peers went there to meet girls, and curiousity got the better of me, being in a boy school and all, i decided to go along too.

people jumped, people claps and cheer, "singers" as i called them then sang, the band played, as if im watching an taiwanese idol concert. it was a very uncomfortable session i must say, i think im just not someone who expresses myself that way, even till today.

with so many different worship style, sometimes i just wonder is there a correct way to do it. this chapter really provided some good food for thought. Many forms of praise are mentioned in the Bible, among them confessing, singing, shouting, standing in honour, kneeling, dancing, making joyful noises, testifying, playing musical instruments, and raising hands. The best style of worship is the one that most authentically represents your love for God, based on the background and personality God gave you... If God intentionally made us all different, why should everyone be expected to love God in the same way?

clean fight

so once again, my facebook feed is flooded with people who wants to voice their opinions and listen to few. few other events get singaporeans so worked up and this is one of them - an election, or this time round, a by-election, the second one in 2 years.

happened to catch some of the news so far, and a short summary clip of the candidates, it's quite sad that most of their tactics is to pour shame and paint the opponents as incapable useless people. i remember reading a dan brown book, whereby one of the person running for the US presidential election didn't want to go down the road of digging up scandals of the other party. somehow, that really caused me to view at things in a different light since.

i still look forward to someone, who can convince people because he/she is capable, and not because he/she is better able to paint the opponent as a bigger failure. it easy for people to criticise others who are doing it, but what makes one think that he/she can do a better job if he/she is in the same shoes? "i promise that i can......" really.. talk is free, anyone can say that.

it's also amazing how people just so blindly buy into whatever their choice of party says. arguments that are so full of loopholes and ambiguity, it makes swiss cheese looks rock solid. a quote i just heard "you should vote more of us in so that we can make the others work harder".. it sounds ok on surface, but if you think about it, are they saying whoever is in is not capable to make the others work harder?

what are we losing just to gain that small little insignificant thing that eventually will fade away as time passes? is getting into office such an important thing that one has to do such things? i still remember the days of TPL, how many aquaintances, whom i thought were decent nice people chose to reveal their ugly side and make condemnation of TPL that went beyond just capability, but to something downright personal. at the end of it, she is someone's daughter, she is someone's granddaughter, she is someone's wife, she is as human being, as imperfect as anyone of us.

strangely, one of my ex-colleague which i find hardest to love once used a story that he said he witnessed during a training session in a primary school that really make me think about how we treat others.

i was walking to my next class when i passed by a primary one class. the teacher in charge was either absent, or left the class for a while, and left the class monitor in charge. so the class monitor was up in front at the blackboard, with a piece of chalk in his hand. on the blackboard were names of the students i presume. we are all so familiar with this sight, whoever misbehave, jot down the name and let the teacher know later. on the chalkboard were a lot of names, maybe the entire class. puzzled as the students were all so quiet and doing their work, i stayed a while until the class is over and asked the class monitor why did he write down all the names. it turned out that unlike most of us, the class monitor chose to write down the names of those who behaving obediently.

it took a primary one student to show us something that most of us forget. seeing the bad things about people is so easy, but you know, seeing the good in people often works some much better than the former.

sometimes, you dont have to put down others to produce good results. actually, most of the time more than sometimes..

PDL #12 - Developing that friendship

The truth is - you are as close to God as you choose to be. Intimate friendship with God is a choice, not an accident. You must intentionally seek it.

This line pretty much sum up the whole chapter and basically what goes on in life. People that say they cant feel God, christian or not, very much dont really want to meet God.

For the atheists, they always have so many statements that support their disbelief, but whenever a valid rebuke comes along, they refuse to listen it, must less accept it. they basically have chosen to stick to their view, no matter what happens.

For the curious, they eventually find out enough, enough to convince them, but something just holds them back.

For the struggling christians, many will admit they have backslided along the way. the sad thing is they know something is wrong, yet they do not want to do anything about it. it's like having a leaking tap at home and refusing to fix it.

everyone is given a choice. how we choose is what set us apart from one another.

PDL #11 - F.R.I.E.N.D.S

often, people talk about their relationship with God in different aspects - Creator, Lord, Master, Judge, Redeemer. one of the thing that is not that often mentioned, but just as true is that God can be and yearns to be our Friend! not just any mere acquaintance, not a project group mate in school, not someone you say hi to at the lift. rather, He wants to be a friend that is there when you graduate from school, your best man or bridesmaid at your wedding, the one you turn to when you need someone to pour out your woes to.

this really remind me of one of the hymn that i first heard 16 years ago, way before i knew who God really is.
what a friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and grief to bear!
what a privilege to carry, everything to God in prayer.
oh, what peace we often forfeit, oh, what needless pain we bear,
all because we do not carry, everything to God in prayer.

i know Facebook is a very poor indicator, but looking at the number of "friends" we have on Facebook, you would think that at least one can be there whenever you need a friend. chances are, often they can be there, but there's no guarantee they will be there all the time. but i know He is always there, and He can be always there for you too, if you let Him.

He badly wants to be our friend, do we want to let Him be?

PDL #10 - Heart of worship

The heart of worship is surrender.

Surrender is defined as to yield to the possession or power of another. through the ages, human find it very hard to surrender to anything. surrender usually means your are giving up control of your situation, giving up your power, to follow the plans of another. this is more so in this age whereby technology has caused everyone to have an inflated view of their own ability and knowledge. sorry is a word that i hardly ever hear anymore, especially from people who really should say it.

surrendering to human is difficult. surrendering to God is another level of difficulty, or so it seems. with God, often, when you surrender, you dont get a preview of the outcome. this uncertainty causes a lot of people to be uncomfortable, and hence they resist. people wants to be in control.

hence, to surrender willingly, having trust is very important. you choose to trust that Him who you surrender to loves you a lot, He knows what's going on and He won't leave you to fend for yourself.

honestly, i dont know where my life is going. what the church will become in 3 years time. whether ill meet someone ill spend the rest of my life with. where am i going to work at next. do i like the uncertainty? of course not. its scary, much more scary than going on a trip myself (which i have since semi conquered!).. but that's the best part right? only in such uncertainty can i show my trust, and to know eventually that my trust is not misplaced.

PDL #9 - Making Him smile

so if our first purpose is to make Him smile, so we should know what are the things that will make Him smile right?

God smiles when:

• we trust Him completely
• we obey Him wholeheartedly
• we praise and thank Him continually
• we use our abilities

the character example the author used was Noah. Noah is a character that really shows his obedience and his trust clearly. Im always reminded of the hollywood adaptation of Noah - Evan Almighty. basically in the movie, Evan went through what Noah did, but in the modern context. Evan was tasked by God to build an ark so that they can escape the flood. the setting of the show was that the place Evan stayed at was going through a long period of drought, hence, a flood is pretty much the most ridiculous thing that can happen then, from human's point of view. after some struggling and bargaining, Evan was convinced by God, and went ahead with the building while getting ridiculed and laughed at.

it is so true isnt it. when God asks us to do things, they will often be seen as ridiculous things by people who dont understand. they will laugh at christians for doing weird things. many will falter, fearing the judgement by their peers, but many will go against the odds and stay faithful to their calling.

who are you in this story? laughing at things you dont understand? faltering when being laughed at? standing strong even against persecutions because you know something others dont?

PDL #8 - Purpose 1

many things happened the past three days, resulting in me having to take a 3 day break from the book. but in a very strange coincident, i continue today with a brand new segment of the book: purpose #1

You were planned for God's pleasure.

The moment you were born into the world, God was there as an unseen witness, smiling at your birth... God did not need to create you, but He chose to create you for His own enjoyment...

i like the author put it, if you are important enough for God to create you, you will never have a problem feeling insignificant. He considers you valuable enough to keep with Him for eternity, what greater significance could you have?

PDL #7 - the reason

everything that happens is because of God. For everything comes from God alone. Everything lives by His power, and everything is for His glory. God created all mankind to show the glory of God and we, mankind can do so in 5 ways:

• by worshipping Him
• by loving other believers
• by becoming like Christ
• by serving others with our gifts
• by telling others about Him

all 5 ways have their own set of difficulties. and if you ask me anytime before a year ago, i would easily say "by loving other believers" would be the easiest thing to do. how things have changed in the past 1 year. telling others about Him was one of the hardest, but I made a resolution that this year, I will bring my first person to Christ! (pray for me) Anyway, loving other believers, has since become such a difficult thing. its even harder when you know you are suppose to show love more to some people, and yet, the human side of you think that they dont deserve it. i pray, that God will teach me patience, to love everyone, especially the believers.

PDL #6 - Temporary

the first line basically sums up this chapter really well. Life on earth is a temporary assignment.

indeed, the 60 70 odd years, compared to eternity is really temporary if you look at it that way. Earth is only a temporary residence. You wont be here long, so don't get too attached to it. if we view it this way, then we should really think about what we should working for, working for this 60 - 70 years on earth, or working for eternity. it's funny, yet makes so much sense how the author puts it - In order to keep us from becoming too attached to earth, God allows us to feel a significant amount of discontent and dissatisfaction in life - longings that will never be fulfilled on this side of eternity.

it really puts things into perspective. humans will never be satisified with life. a poor begger may think earning a million dollars will make him satisfied, but how often are millionaires satisfied with their millions? there's always the urge to want something more. but the truth is, nothing in this earth will help you find total satsifaction. let me know if you know anyone who is totally satisfied in life, chances are, you wont find any.

PDL #5 - Seeing life from God's view

so, knowing that God made us, how then can we find our purpose? the book suggest that there are 3 - life is a test, life is a trust and life is a temporary assignment

why does God test us? Character is both developed and revealed by tests, and all of life is a test.. God constantly watches your response to people, problems, success, conflict, illnesses disappointment... You will be tested by major changes, delayed promises, impossible problems, unanswered prayers, undeserved criticism, and even senseless tragedies.

A very important test is how you act when you can't feel God's presence in your life.. [sometimes] God leaves [us] alone to test [our] character, to reveal a weakness and to prepare [us] for more responsibility

the past two years have indeed been a test. a test that i started badly and failing. one that i slowly crawled out of the dark hole, but with still a huge sack on my back. one that im trying hard to really climb out of. it's also a test of how much i trust Him when nothing in the future is clear at all. each possible path looks equally ambiguous, equally likely to hit a dead end.

but that is faith isnt it? trusting when you cant see...

PDL #4 built to last

if our 100 years or so of life on earth is all that is to it, one should really just start living it up immediately and forget all about the ethical and moral issues. that is if life is all that. however, we are created for eternity. life on earth is just a warm up, one would have to spend eternity in one of two locations - heaven or hell. when you view it in this light, then how you live this short life is very important! you can choose to live for yourself, and risk spending eternity in hell, or you can choose to find out who your Creator is, what your purpose is, and live your life according to that.

This world is fading away, along with everything it craves. But if you do the will of God, you will live forever. 1 Jn 2:17

Are you willing to gamble away your eternity away?

randoms #35642

taking a break from the 40 days reading of the purpose driven life.. here are some random good things that i thought i should share..

the hobbit & wreck it ralph
so i havent catch a show at the cinema for quite some time, so it was really nice that i managed to catch the hobbit as well as wreck it ralph over the christmas-new year holiday period. despite what the critics say (i seem to always disagree with those people), i really did enjoy the hobbit. a fan of overlapping stories and cameos, the hobbit really had a fair share of them, especially since i read and watched LOTR quite a few times. speaking of cameos, wreck it ralph was full of them and i really like this show too. produced by disney, this animation is so different from the usual disney cartoons. a show whereby a bad guy from a video game had enough of being a bad guy and wants to be the hero instead. this show is especially good for video game fans with cameos from the likes of zangief, pacman, as well as the infamous contra cheat code from the era of NES.

once upon a time
it is this show that's showing on channel 5 on wednesday nights. its basically about how the evil queen sent all the fairy tale characters into a town in the real world, and most of the characters cant remember who they were. so each episode, it focuses on one character and the modern version of their fairy tale story.. with a twist. if you like how wicked tells the story of the witches of oz, you might just like this show. like today's episode was about how the mad hatter (from alice in wonderland) became the mad hatter, why he attends tea parties, how he ended up in wonderland.

when you drop a G2
im a big fan of pilot G2 pen since.... forever. it has been my choice of pen since ever... it saw me through the Os, the As, the countless lit / geog / econs essays.. the only complain i have is that it is easily spoilt if you ever drop it. so last week, i went to popular to restock on my G2s, and after I picked it up from the shelf, i dropped it on my way to the cashier. not thinking that it is spoilt, i went ahead to pay it. to my disappointment, when i got home, i discovered that it isnt working very well anymore. and strangely, no bookshop in singapore keep stock of the orange refill, i thought that's like $2+ down the drain. i was about to throw it away when i just thought i should try and pull out the tip from my old pen and change it, not being sure whether that is possible or not. it turned out that the tip comes off easily! so next time if you ever spoil the G2 tip, you can just swap it with an old one!

PDL #3 - The driving force

what drives your life? are you driven by guilt? resentment and anger? fear? materialism? or the need for people's approval? if it is any of the above, then your life will most likely be going off course sooner or later. without a purpose, life is pointless really. what is my driving force?

PDL day #2 - i am no accident..

there's always that joke about how horrifying if you find out that you were born because of an unfortunate accident, that your parents didnt plan for you. this certainly happened to one of the acquaintance i met during uni. the wife was pregnant almost immediately after they got married, and the general knowledge was that they werent planning to start a family just yet then.

one of the definition of accident as taken from dictionary.com is "chance; fortune; luck". it is something beyond human's control. if we look at it this way, then all birth, planned or unplanned are accidents. people can increase their chances but ultimately, they have no control over whether one will get a baby or not. but the truth is we are not the result of astronomical random chance in the universe. God, our Creator, planned for us even before we were born. He chose who our parents are, what are race will be, where we will be born. We are alive because God wants us to be, he customed made us for a reason, for His purpose.

now as i think about all these, it means that everything about me was carefully planned for. how i look, my personality, my background, my family, everything. He place me in such a position for a reason. sometimes, just sometimes, dont you just wish you were born to a different family, with different looks, in a different country? i can say whenever we have such thoughts, it is almost always because of our selfish desires, what we wish to have in life. we can have everything we want in life, but if we cannot fill up the emptiness of a missing purpose in life, then we will never ever by satisfied with whatever we have.....

here's one of my all time favourite song (always have a soft spot for ballards), it's a pity we dont sing it much, except for christmas..

PDL day #1 - it is not about me!

so yesterday, i was pondering about the purpose in life. so i decided to dig out the book which i last read 4 years ago and decided to read it again and embark on this 40 days journey once again..

there are many many self help books out there, books to help one become successful, to attain life's goals, to plan your career, what to do with your life. it is almost always about "me", the individual and what to achieve for "myself" in life. that's why they are called self-help books as they are meant to benefit the self. many of these books become bestsellers, and really help many people achieve something in life, but all these are just goals you set for yourself, they are not your purpose.

purpose. what did our monkeys ancestors in mind when they evolve into humans? its funny how all the things we can achieve in life, the cash, the house, the cars, the children and grandchildren, the empire, all these things will go to past. when our life here is up, we cant bring them away.

so all these things doesnt make sense..... and it wont until you know why you are created and what the creator's purpose for you is. You were made by God and for God - and until you understand that, life will never make sense. you wont know how to use a new invention until the inventor tells you thr purpose of the invention, likewise, you wont know your purpose until the Person who created you tell you why you were created.. so it's really about what the Creator's purpose is and not our's............

what is my purpose in life?

so another pretty routine sunday past by, church service, cell didnt happen, jam a little, went to get food, frisbee not happening. so i spent the afternoon learning to play another song, a song we sang in the morning (as well as to finally start on final fantasy xiii).

making a difference
won't You Lord, take a look at our hands. everything we have, use it for Your plans
won't You Lord, take a look at our hearts. mould it, refine it as You set us apart

we want to run to the altar, and catch the fire, to stand in the gap between the living and the dead
give us a heart of compassion, for a world without vision, we will make a difference, bringing hope to our land.

i think about my life, a life that has been a fixed routine for who knows how long. i wake up, go to work, look forward to the weekends. weekends come, waste the days away and soon find myself dreading mondays once again. surely, life does not revolves around this. a life of no meaning and no purpose.

so what on earth am I here for? the darwinites believe that we are the tail-less, non hunch back evolved version of some form of monkeys. others believe we came from some seeding from outer space. there are others who are clueless and couldnt care more about it. i would say that the answer lies in a compilation of books that was written thousand of years ago.

Col 1:16 - For by Him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by Him and for Him.

all these got me thinking of this other book that i read years ago. i remembered the last time i read it, i didnt take away too much from it, but i have decided to re-read the purpose driven life and im sure this time round, it will mean more to me...

welcome 2013!

the most cliche of cliches, the end of the year / start of the next year usually brings a list, a list of resolutions, a list of things people hope to achieve in the upcoming year.

i dont remember having many resolutions over the span of my 29+ years, but this year, i somehow decided to come up with two.

#1 to exercise at least once a week
so ever since i stopped training with chuckies (2 years ago) and sunday frisbee became irregular, i havent been exercising reguarly and i let myself get away with it. i always hated jogging but i decided enough is enough, and if im not going to play frisbee that week, i better catch up with some running. and to kick off things in style, i went  for a jog today! i know 14mins for 2.4km is nothing to shout about, but for someone who hasnt run in ages, i was quite satisfied with it! hopefully ill be able to keep this up

#2 to cook more
well, for this to happen, i need people to eat my food! anyone wants to be lab rats?